*This review is based entirely on the 2023 screen adaptation of the novel of the same name*
"Shall I stay, would it be a sin...?"
One of the most memorable scenes of Red, White and Royal Blue is a slow dance set to Perfume Genius' cover of Elvis Presley's 1961 classic "Can't Help Falling In Love". The song serves as a perfect parable of the movie. Its lyrics and music could hardly be more familiar and yet nothing about it feels tired or outdated, and if it catches you in the right mood, it may well move you to tears.
The narrative is so straightforward that it could have just as easily been written for the stage. There are no major twists, no surprise ending. Just the story of two people who according to their upbringing should not be suited for each other who happen to fall in love. Two strong leads, supported by a handful of universally recognizable side characters; the strict but loving mother, the jealous ex, the loyal best friend and the comedic "she who opens the door at the wrong time" - a role so essential they gave it to two people.
Speaking of comedy, there isn't really that much of it, as the scales come down heavily on the "rom" side of rom-com. But the jokes are mostly well timed and - excessive use of phallic imagery aside - not too on the nose. Special recognition goes out to Thomas Flynn as Crown Prince Phillip for his delivery of quintessential sibling disgust: "Good God, no!"
"What's a bellend?" "Look it up."
What is however far more relevant for the overall quality of RWRB as a film is the decision to risk (accept?) an American R-rating rather than “tone it down”.
While there is no plausible justification for the adult label (the film is classified 12+ throughout Europe which is far more suitable given the content) beyond US rating agencies' bias towards queer love stories, the "R" turns out to be what saves this story from stumbling into Fairytale or Barbieland territory.
Firstly, people swear and curse in moderation, which adds a nice dose of real life to their emotional outbursts. Also, we get to see quite a bit of skin, omitting which would have been a terrible waste given how stunningly handsome both leads are. And yes, they have sex, like real people do (only more beautiful). More on that later.
It is also worth pointing out that for the most part, RWRB stays clear of the more disturbing and creepy range of rom-com clichés - with one minor exception which I will address at the end. While there is a decent amount of misunderstanding and misinterpretation happening between Alex and Henry and everyone else, none of it is ever intentional. There is no scheming, no "I lied because I love you", no criminal offense masked as a big romantic gesture. Both men are refreshingly open about their respective situations - as Henry puts it he does “nothing but explain himself” every chance he gets. This is also evident in the intimate scenes - there is music and mood lighting and a view of the Eiffel tower, but there is also talk and embarrassment, and validation of each others' feelings.
There is one moment, however, where the story falls prey to the old stereotype of "it’s okay if he’s cute". Outside the New Year's party, Henry and Alex have their first private in-person conversation since the time they were locked in a broom closet together several months earlier. While they have spent the meantime frequently texting and having late-night conversations over the phone, neither have admitted to being attracted to the other. Yet, Henry makes a surprise lunge at Alex, planting a passionate kiss on him. I appreciate that this comes after a scene of Alex casually kissing multiple women, thus making it obvious for the audience as well as to Henry that a drunken kiss per se is probably not a huge deal to Alex. Nonetheless, this felt too much like a plot device to cause angst for the characters rather than an organic development. It's a minor gripe, but in a film that cares so much about its protagonists, this feels worth noting.
I was also not fully sold on Henry's admiration for Alex' work. "You are out there changing the world" is a massive exaggeration when referring to an election campaign tour, and personally, I don't see why Henry would be so quick to diminish his own charity work (without cameras!). Maybe the book provides a better explanation, but I am a firm believer that a screen adaptation should be fully capable of standing on its own without the need to reference back to its source material.
On a more personal note, I would have liked to see a bit more depth and controversy in the reactions of both Alex' dad and King James. As mentioned above, the adult rating provides a degree of freedom to say and show what others may not. I can buy into the idea that (for the sake of subverting Hispanic stereotypes if nothing else) Mr. Diaz really did not bat an eyelash at the fact that his only son sucks royal c*ck. But as a Southern politician, I would have expected at least a fleeting moment of concern for Alex' public image. As for the king, his inability to express an opinion which - however misguided and outdated - he must have held for over sixty years feels a bit too easy. I would also like to know what brought on the casting of British gay icon Stephen Fry in the role of the cold-hearted and possibly homophobic monarch - or maybe I am just reading too much into this. I did enjoy Alex reacting like a guilty schoolboy to being told to shut up though, great facial expressions there.
All things considered "Red, White and Royal Blue" is a splendid way to spend two hours of your life, and if news of a sequel are true, maybe even a few more than that. Just be prepared to have that song stuck in your head for days to come.
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